This article will discuss how to get your ex to open up emotionally to you again.
I’ve used the process to bridge the emotional gap between two people who’ve broken up or who were on the brink of breaking up. A vital component of the process is for both parties to get something emotional from the breakup process.
This is to teach you about both yourself and your partner.
Through the process, you’ll learn your partners’ hidden vulnerabilities and tendencies that could keep your relationship in jeopardy in the future.
Moreover, you’ll learn the exact reactions they would have if you tried to break up with them. And that’s the only time you need to ask for a breakup or breakup.
This is to avoid any misunderstandings that can lead to drama. And the best part is that the more you practice and learn, the better you’ll get.
There are a few steps you need to follow to follow up on this process.
Identify your partner’s hidden flaws and traits
Being hurt is a part of being a human being. When you get hurt, it’s normal to think about what I could have done differently and regret the past.
It’s normal to ask yourself, “Why me?”
, what’s not normal is feeling guilty about the past actions you did and blaming yourself for the same actions. In other words, you must accept the fact that you did something that you now regret.
That’s how we all are. Even if we have done something good, we have regrets about what we did not do right.
In fact, they shape who we are today.
What’s the point in keeping them as memories? What’s the point in holding on to them as if they were gold?
You just can’t let go of what’s already been.
You can’t feel ashamed about the past, yet you have to look for the silver lining. It could be something as simple as coming from a broken home, which you’re working your way out of, or has happened in the past.
You can’t allow it to define who you are today.
Instead, acknowledge the truth and learn from it. As for your partner, their life is already way better than what they made it into.
They’re already dealing with something that you cannot imagine.
Go ahead and do your part. Allow your partner to focus on you instead of thinking about themselves.
Know what makes you both come together
Nobody knows what makes them come together better than each other. And if you are willing to go through all of the processes, you’ll understand your partners’ hidden traits and secrets.
This is where you have to start by taking a look at the current stage in your relationship and figuring out what you really want from each other. Even if you know what each other needs, it’s also important to keep a constant awareness of what you want.
One of the hardest things is to look at each other and see the real person looking back at you. To do so, you must understand their emotional state and identify how their behavior reflects them.
Understanding is key.
Once you know what each partner wants, you can start crafting how you can best give them what they need. Whether that’s you reaching out to your partner, asking them if they need time away from you, or looking out for their well-being, you have to be upfront with your partner.
Your partner must know exactly what you need from them, and then you have to work hard to get them to give that to you.
But that’s the key: you have to work hard on your partner, just like how the bad guy in a movie always tries to make the good guy come first.
If you want to know what makes you two come together, it’s something that you must work on.
Set up a personal values evaluation
Now that you understand what your partner wants from you, you have to start making a list of what you both expect from each other. This is called a Personal Values Evaluation.
A values evaluation is a simple, quick way to gauge your partner’s character and help you figure out if they’re on the same page as you. It’s not something that you have to do with a high degree of seriousness, and it shouldn’t be something that you do regularly.
But once in a while, it’s good to take stock of what’s working in your relationship.
It can be done in two ways. You can use an online app to assess your partner’s values or do it with them as you meet in person.
Do it when you are together, be honest with them, and see what is working and what isn’t.
The key here is to take each value seriously and not underestimate your partner. Remember, each value directly impacts your partner’s ability to function in a healthy relationship.
You might find out that the core value your partner holds most dear is his family. But your partner might also have deficient emotional intelligence or be abusive, for example.
Either way, take note of their values and how they affect their current and future behavior.
Establish relationship boundaries
A relationship with boundaries is an essential part of a healthy relationship. Establishing these boundaries between each other will help you give the gift of self that you desire.
You have to know what boundaries are for your relationship. Don’t expect your partner to know what you need at the moment.
Respect that they have their own limits, and help them see where yours lie.
Establishing a relationship-centered boundary helps you and your partner make decisions together. It is essential to feel as though your partner is trying to push their boundaries, resulting in conflict in your relationship.
Again, this is an area where each partner must be completely honest with each other. It’s easy to blame your partner for pushing their boundaries, but it’s usually a lack of self-awareness that is at play.
Also, take care that these boundaries aren’t too vague. It’s great to be able to say, “I’m not going to have sex for three weeks after we get back from vacation,” and then forget about it entirely. But it’s also important to establish boundaries and stick to them.
This also helps ensure that you don’t spend the rest of your relationship living in the past.
